I don't actually have a boyfriend right now. In fact I haven't had a boyfriend in over twenty years. But having a boyfriend is totally who I am. Ever since I was very young I've wanted to have a boyfriend, so I know I was born this way. Having a Boyfriend is my nature, whether I have a boyfriend or not. Don't look at those little surface details. What I do doesn't matter. Look at my heart. If you do, you'll see that in my innermost heart, I have a boyfriend. It's who I am.
To tell you the truth, though, I've been doing some hard thinking lately. I've begun to realize that I'm not really about Having a Boyfriend after all. I'm really about Getting Married. Back in primitive times there wasn't gay marriage, but now that there is, I'm coming out as wanting to have a husband. This is really important to me. It must have been in my DNA all along.
So from now on, I hope you all will respect my identity: I'm Married. I don't have a husband yet, and really, having a husband seems like more trouble than it would be worth. But you shouldn't have to have a husband to be married. That's like going by heterosexual stereotypes. Being Married is just who I am, whether I have a husband or not. I might want to have a wedding, though, a big glamorous wedding in a church, like in Sex and the City: The Movie. I'll have to think about it some more, but when I get it planned, I hope you all will attend. And give me presents. Because that's what weddings are all about.
